Oh no. I fear the monotony of this deployment is having its effect. I, along with everyone else here, am becoming a child, a little boy.

The last few nights I’ve had a recurring scary dream. I suppose you could even call it a nightmare, or a night terror; the fear I feel when I wake up is that real.

It always starts out the same. I’m in some random place, passing the time with friends when all of the sudden I feel the urge to use the restroom. I make my way to a bathroom, sometimes on the run, desperately looking for any place to pee. And when I find it…I go. I pee in my dream. And then I wake up.

This is serious, waking up in your bed after dreaming you just went to the bathroom is the scariest thing you will ever wake up to. Can you imagine my horror? My “check” in and around my sleeping bag? It’s frightening, I promise.

I guess that’s what happens when you spend half the night “holding it”. You have to walk half a block to use the bathroom around here. Given the choice between waking up, putting on shoes, and walking in the cold to the port-a-potty or just staying in bed and hoping for the best…I always choose the latter. I choose sleep. I choose dreams. Dreams where I pee.

In case you’re wondering, no, I have not wet my bed…yet. Although if I don’t stop drinking water…who knows. Now, that’s scary.

Four Months to go.

Ugh, four has never felt like such a large number. Although I’m happy to report that I’m finally starting to get used to this place. I’m not sure if that’s a good thing or not. Don’t get me wrong, I can’t wait to get out of here, but I figure since I have four months left I should probably try to enjoy it.

So, today was my first chance to go ‘outside’ the gate here in Afghanistan. I can’t really say much other than it was definitely interesting. I’ve never been to a place where the term “3rd World Country” is actually an understatement. I’ve never heard of the term 4th world, but if there is one, that’s Afghanistan.

I don’t understand that song anymore, it’s driving me crazy. Seriously, the lyrics are confusing.

“A beautiful sight, we’re happy tonight, walking in a winter wonderland.” What??

Even more confusing is the last part:

“We’ll frolic and play, the Eskimo way, walking in a winter wonderland.”

Today was my first taste of Afghanistan, and I mean that both literally and figuratively.

Here’s why:

Yesterday was Sunday.
Yesterday was my day off.
I woke up around 10:30.
I read a book, in my bed, until 12:30.
I ate a bowl of cereal.
I read some more.
I took a nap.
I read.
I played Guitar Hero.
I took a nap.
I ate dinner.
I read.
I called Steph*
I read.
I went to bed.
I’m not sure if that’s what God meant when He [...]

Here’s what happens during a deployment, most of the time: a person deploys, they go to work, they go to the gym, and they go to bed; in between they eat healthy and come back looking all lean and mean. That’s not happening to me. I’m not coming back lean, or mean. I’m going with a new approach. I’m coming home fat.

I’m here, and I’m settled. That’s the big news for this blog post. I know I haven’t written anything for almost a month, but to be honest I didn’t really care to. I had bigger, better things to do, like, for example, spend time with Stephanie and just forget about the outside world for the two weeks that I was home. Unfortunately, those two weeks are over, as in long gone.

So, this week of Combat Skills Training at Fort Dix, New Jersey has me at a simulated FOB, which means Forward Operating Base. Basically, we are living as if we were in Iraq or Afghanistan, which means living in tents and dealing with limited showers and limited hours for food, etc. Actually, this is a bit worse than it is going to be in Afghanistan. I can only shower once every other day…and I have to fight for a shower. They have 700 people here, and only 24 showers…so figure that one out. I’ve talked to a few Army people here and they all say they’d rather be in Iraq…so there you have it…this sucks.