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Who is Britton’s Mom?
So, this week of Combat Skills Training at Fort Dix, New Jersey has me at a simulated FOB, which means Forward Operating Base. Basically, we are living as if we were in Iraq or Afghanistan, which means living in tents and dealing with limited showers and limited hours for food, etc. Actually, this is a bit worse than it is going to be in Afghanistan. I can only shower once every other day…and I have to fight for a shower. They have 700 people here, and only 24 showers…so figure that one out. I’ve talked to a few Army people here and they all say they’d rather be in Iraq…so there you have it…this sucks.
To add to the suck, the weather has dropped to freezing temperatures…and the wind has decided to blow cold and strong. In order to get any sleep I have to bury myself in an Army issued sleeping bag (which is awesome) and pray for no wind to get through. Other than the temperatures and the showers, it’s actually pretty cool how the Army has this place set up. They have actual middle eastern people here to play the roles of local civilians in Iraq and they have the Muslim prayer go off over the sound system five times a day…all to simulate actually being in Iraq or Afghanistan, it’s pretty detailed.
They also have a million portable toilets, or port-a-potties I guess is how you would spell it. Which mean it’s a bit gross when you have to go to the bathroom here. Add the 700 people to the multiple port-a-potties and you’re going to get a lot of graffiti inside the toilets…and most of it is about Britton’s Mom.
I have no idea who Britton is, or what he did to get somebody so mad at him (or her) that they decided to go to nearly every port-a-potty and write something about his (or her) mom. Seriously…almost every toilet I go into has something written on the walls that starts with Britton’s mom… For example, and I’ll keep the examples clean: Britton’s mom isn’t afraid of IED’s, Britton’s mom doesn’t “tap out”, and there are a ton more that I don’t remember or don’t want to share. Even yesterday, and today, when I went ten miles away from the FOB to train on a different range, there in the port-a-potty is a sentence about Britton’s mom. It’s almost become a game for me. Every time I enter a new toilet I look around for something else I can learn about Britton’s mom. At least it’s entertainment.
I only have two weeks left here…two weeks from tomorrow…so that’s good. It’s about time I get home.
I’ll have another blog about CST and stuff when it’s all over. Until then…I’m going to see if I can find out who is Britton’s mom.
When you get to Kuwait can you look and see if the Ninja Diaries have been updated. Someone went through all the johns there and put little known facts about ninjas in them. They were pretty funny I have to say