My Thoughts

Gary Payton and Shawn Kemp

When I was a kid I would hide away in my family’s basement, sit down next to the washer and dryer and spend the next three hours, nerves on full alert, wishing my favorite basketball team to victory. I’d cheer, I’d yell, I’d tell others to shut up; the Seattle Supersonics were on and nothing else mattered.

Tom Chambers, Xavier McDaniel, Dale Ellis, Ricky Pierce, Gary Payton, Shawn Kemp, Nate McMillan, Sam Perkins, Detlef Schrempf, Hersey “The Hawk” Hawkins…these guys were my heroes, they were my favorite TV stars and every night they were on I would sit down, turn on the TV, and watch them soar.

It’s hard to describe the feelings of a fan. There is pure joy when your team does well, pure anger, or sadness, when they fail. Like the ball itself, it’s a constant up and down. In 1992 the Sonics had the best record in basketball and somehow lost in the playoffs to the Denver Nuggets. Up and then down. My first prayer might have honestly been for Dikembe Mutombo to break an ankle.

I remember jumping up and down in my living room on a summer night in 1996 when the Sonics beat the Utah Jazz to go to the NBA Finals. That night I was up, way up. Two weeks later I was down, way down, they lost to that Michael Jordan guy and the Bulls.

A few years ago Ray Allen, Rashard Lewis, and Co. were the surprise of the league. After a few down years, I was up again…only to go back down when Tim Duncan and the Spurs came to town.

1996 NBA Finals

Up and then down. As a fan you get used to it, it comes and goes with the wins and the losses, but never, do you ever, expect to go as far down as I feel today: the Sonics are leaving Seattle. I don’t know when, but they’re leaving and they will no longer be ‘my’ Sonics. The feeling is worse than any playoff loss, way worse. If I were less of a man, I’d be able to hold back the tears.

There are reasons to be sad, and I’m sad because of them; there are reasons to be mad and I’m mad because of them. David Stern, Clay Bennett, Howard Schultz, Washington State Lawmakers, it’s all of their faults. A part of me is angry, a part of me is sad, a part of me doesn’t know what to do.

What do I do? It sounds like a dumb question, but every basketball season from here on out I’ll ask it of myself. There will be no team to cheer on, no green and gold uniforms to wear, no hope for a good season, just emptiness. Maybe I’ll become a Portland fan…no, that will never happen. Maybe I’ll become a Spurs fan. I live in San Antonio now, and I hear they’re pretty good. I even got excited when Tim Duncan hit that three pointer the other night.

But a part of me feels becoming a fan of any team is too risky. What happens when they start to lose? What happens when the stars retire? What happens when the arena is old and the team wants a new one? It’s all too risky. This could happen to any team in any city and perhaps its best to avoid the NBA for good. No matter how many ups a new team might bring, it’s just not worth it. Not if there’s a chance of another down like this.

Update 4/22/08:

I thought I’d add this video…it pretty much says everything.